Would We, The Illuminati, Lie to You? - May 1, 2008

Here at the Spark, we try to keep level heads about what we consider to be our raison d'etre -- keeping you abreast of what's happening in the world and on the web. But today is special: We've been admitted to that rarefied club of conspirators who secretly keep the world running! This secret fraternity got its start on May 1, 1776, when a group of intellectuals formed the Illuminati as a "freethinking" society, but the group soon merged with the Freemasons and a cabal of international bankers to rule the world.  In the centuries since, this group has ruled wisely and well, managing to hide from the public the Truth about alien visitation, cheap and plentiful energy, cars that run on water, political assassinations, teleportation, mass transit, and breakthrough drugs, while filling the media with such made-up stories as the Apollo 11 moon landing and the Da Vinci Code.  Over the years, the cabal has been joined by such like-thinkers as the members of the Trilateral Commission, Yale's Skull and Bones, and the Bohemian Grove -- all of whom work toward making life simpler and less complicated. We can't tell you how proud we are to become part of this age-old tradition of misinformation and cover-ups; it's truly a dream come true for us. So, in the future, please remember that everything we tell you is absolutely true and presented for your own well-being. Our motto? We never lie and we're always right. Suggested Sites... 36 of the Most Popular Conspiracy Theories in the U.S. - a nice little collection of things you absolutely should not believe. Conspiracy Planet - all the alternative news that isn't fit to print. The Illuminati - the official site for what's really happening in the world of you-don't-need-to-know. Illuminati Conspiracy Archive - a rich stew of what's "really" happening. Wikipedia: List of Conspiracy Theories - you didn't hear it from us.