Well, I hadn’t intended to write about my choices for the
upcoming TCM Film Festival, but it seems to be the thing to do among the cognoscenti.
I should warn my dear readers, though, my opinions being
what they are, I may well insult a favorite film of yours. There are just some
films for which I have no tolerance, regardless of their being beloved by many
(and having the “classic” imprimatur stamped on them by their presence at the
Festival—although every time TCM has a day of Elvis movies, that definition
gets stretched to the point of incredulity … see, I’ve already started). So,
consider yourself warned, because here we go with the intro.
The Festival itself is now in its tenth year. I’ve been
to nine of them. (I would have been there in 2018 had I not been cast in a show
that ran at the same time.) The festivities begin on Thursday night, and
stretch over a weekend up and down Hollywood Boulevard (or at least that section
that stretches between the Chinese and Egyptian Theatres—with assorted side
trips to the Cinerama Dome on Sunset and—this year—the American Legion post up
on Highland), to the point of exhaustion.
I use that word “exhaustion” advisedly, but it amazes how
tiring it is to sit in a dark room and watch movies all day, from 9:00 am until
after midnight (assuming one has that much stamina).
THURSDAY
Things begin with the gala opening night show. In the
past, we’ve been shown some actual classics and restored gems, but there are
the occasional WTF entries, including Funny
Girl and When Harry Met Sally. One
of the themes of this year’s festival is paying tribute to Nora Ephron, which
is another nail in the coffin of definition of “classic,” as far as I’m
concerned. So, that one’s out. Competing in the time slot are Dark Passage, a very good noir with Humphrey
Bogart and Lauren Bacall, filmed largely on location in San Francisco (many of those
locations are still intact), and Gentlemen
Prefer Blondes. I have a very low tolerance for Marilyn Monroe in non-dramatic
parts, and have seen the Bogart many times, so I’ll be starting with Night
World, a gangster pre-Code with Boris Karloff and a number
choreographed by Busby Berkeley. I’m a sucker for pre-Codes and have never seen
this one, so it’s a natural.
Boris Karloff, cutting a dashing figure
Starting off the next block of films is Ocean’s Eleven, which is highly
enjoyable, but it’s being shown poolside at the Hollywood Roosevelt hotel, but
I’ve found past screenings there to be lacking, as I find myself easily
distracted by the venue and the crowds.
Going up against it is Sergeant York, which is an okay picture, but one I find goes on far
longer than its subject matter can bear, so that’s out.
That leaves me with Mogambo,
with Clark Gable, Ava Gardner, and Grace Kelly—but I find post-War Gable
difficult to watch (he’s a man with a death-wish that wasn’t fulfilled) and
Kelly bland, so it’s a nope—and The Umbrellas
of Cherbourg, which I find simultaneously precious and dull, so that’s out.
Fortunately, up against those two is The Bachelor and the Bobby-Soxer,
which is one of my favorite films. I could happily watch the climactic nightclub
scene every day for a year, and I’ve never seen it with an audience, so I’m
good to go there.
Myrna and Cary; it doesn't get much better.
FRIDAY
This is when the real filmgoing begins. Beginning at 9:00
am (which means getting in line at 8:00, which means getting up around 7:00,
after going to bed no earlier than 11:00 or 12:00), we have The Postman Always
Rings Twice (another very good crime picture), The Clock (another of my
favorites, and another I’ve never seen with an audience), High Society (which
has maybe two good numbers and the bland Grace Kelly), but the winner here is
Merrily We Go to Hell, another pre-Code, this time with Sylvia Sidney—in a role—and
Frederic March. There was a temptation to see Cinerama’s Russian Adventure at
10:00, but a little Cinerama can go a long, long way.
Cary Grant (it seems like he's in every picture this year),
Sylvia Sidney, and Frederic March
The mid-morning slot is, basically, Hobson’s Choice; that
is to say, a choice that is really no choice. There’s Out of Africa (which is
one of those films that I saw once, found okay—it's an early example of Meryl Streep
starting to give the same damn performance in every movie—and don’t need to see
again), Love in the Afternoon, a May-December romance between Audrey Hepburn
and Gary Cooper that I find really creepy (the age difference between them is
28 years, but feels like about 90), Sleeping Beauty (I really don’t need to see a
Disney movie under these circumstances--or any circumstances, really ...), so the choice here is What’s Not to
Love About Republic Serials? While I do love Republic serials, I don’t know how much
there is to say about them. That said, these oddball programs generally tend to
be the most memorable.
Sorry, Carol; this is the real Captain Marvel
In the afternoon, we have Raiders of the Lost Ark (preceded
by Ben Burtt and Craig Barron, who use their presentations to discuss the sound
design and other special effects and are always interesting, so I'll probably watch that, then cut out once the picture starts), Broadway Danny
Rose (which I think is one of Woody Allen’s lesser efforts), My Favorite Wife (a
really good screwball comedy—and very tempting), A Patch of Blue (meh), and
(our winner) Sunrise, a classic silent film. I’ve seen Sunrise once and,
despite the raptures people go into over it, found it dull and unmemorable. I’m
hopeful that seeing it on a big screen with an audience and a live orchestra accompanying
it will make me see the light.
Here's hoping!
The early evening brings my first real difficult choice,
in that we start with Vanity Street, yet another pre-Code, Escape from Alcatraz
(which is one of those “if it’s on, I can’t not watch”) movies, Day for Night (with
Jacqueline Bisset in attendance!), and the duds of the slot, The Sound of Music
and Steel Magnolias (to which I say of both “Really?”) I’m thinking of Vanity
Street, because it’s short enough to allow me easier access to the evening
films, but Jacqueline Bisset! This will be a last-minute call.
I mean; c'mon ...
If I do see Vanity Street, it should allow me time to see
Open Secret and Road House, both interesting-sounding noirs. What I can easily
skip are The Opposite Sex (a dismal musical remake of The Women, which is
torturous enough), Do the Right Thing, Winchester ’73, Goodbye, Mr. Chips, and
Desert Hearts, all of which I just don’t care about.
The midnight show is Santo vs. the Evil Brain, but if I
don’t care about the ones just mentioned, I really don’t care about Mexican
wrestling flicks—especially if I have to get up early on Saturday.
SATURDAY
The morning begins with From Here to Eternity, which I’ve
just seen too many times, Double Wedding—which, as much as I love William
Powell and Myrna Loy, is one of their minor efforts, When Worlds Collide, which
I haven’t been able to take seriously or comically since the MST3K guys
deconstructed it, and The Little Colonel, in which I have little patience for
Shirley Temple.
By default then, the winner is All Through the Night,
another of my favorites, which features a fantastic cast (Humphrey Bogart, Peter
Lorre, Conrad Veidt, William Demarest, Judith Anderson, Jackie Gleason, Phil
Silvers) in a story that mixes Runyonesque gangsters and Nazi spies. It should
play great with an audience.
"See that movie? You're gonna watch it."
Mid-morning gives us A Woman Under the Influence (and I
have no tolerance left for John Cassavettes movies), Kind Hearts and Coronets
(which is tempting), Sleepless in Seattle (really, TCM?), and Tarzan and His
Mate. It’ll be another game-time decision between the Guinness and the Tarzan,
with the latter probably winning.
Which will it be?
Afternoon brings us Father Goose (one of those Cary Grant
movies that didn’t need to be made; it’s innocuous enough), Love Affair (which,
with Charles Boyer and Irene Dunne, is sappy but acceptable), Working Girl
(really really, TCM?), and A Raisin in the Sun, all of which strike me as
things I don’t need to see. The oddball in the lot is a double feature of Tom
Mix westerns, which will get the nod here.
Cowboy pictures!
In the early evening, we have Blood Money (another pre-Code!),
Nashville (if I have no tolerance for a Cassavettes picture, I have even less for this
one), Wuthering Heights (meh), and It Happened Here, Kevin Brownlow’s film
about a Nazi invasion of Great Britain, along with Brownlow getting the Robert
Osborne Award for his preservation work, a combination that presents a huge
temptation. If I see that, though, I can’t see Will Rogers in Life Begins at
40. I love Rogers, but love Brownlow more, so that one will probably get the
nod.
Trump's fantasy come true
The evening brings The Bad Seed out at the pool (oy), Indiscreet (another
so-so Grant romcom), Star Wars (I refuse to call it “A New Hope”), but in the
1994 “improved” edition, rather than the 1977 original, which might be a little
tempting. We also have Escape from New York (with a live introduction by John
Carpenter and Kurt Russell) and Waterloo Bridge (the original, pre-Code version
that is much better than the remake), but I’ll opt for Samson and Delilah, a
big hunk of DeMille cheese in a nitrate print that may be best known for
Groucho Marx dismissing it, as he would any picture where “the leading man has
bigger knockers than the leading lady.”
It doesn't get much better than this.
I think I can safely miss the midnight show of The
Student Nurses, exploitative as it may be.
SUNDAY
The final day starts with Hello, Dolly! (goodbye, Babs!),
The Defiant Ones (a good picture, but not one I want to see at 9:00 in the
morning), Holiday (I’d rather see the original version for
a novelty, as I’ve seen the 1938 one too many times) and Mad Love, a crazy
Peter Lorre vehicle that ought to get the blood pumping for the rest of the
day.
Again: "I mean, c'mon ..."
The mid-morning movies are Yours, Mine, and Ours (a
mistake starring Henry Fonda and Lucille Ball that wasn’t good in 1968), Magnificent
Obsession (add Douglas Sirk to directors I just don’t get, along with
Cassavettes and Altman), The Shawshank Redemption (a good movie, but wildly
overrated), and The Robe, another piece of cheese, but (unfortunately) this one
is sincere. I’m hoping for something good in the TBA slots, which are reruns of
things that sold out earlier in the weekend.
"Did I really want to be in the movies this badly?"
The afternoon is another dead zone, with Marty (meh) and the
1964 version of The Killers (which, to me, is notable only for Ronald Reagan
playing the heavy), and Cold Turkey. I don’t think I’ve seen the last, so I’ll probably
opt for that.
Well, at least it's got Dick Van Dyke
Early evening gives us Gone With the Wind (which is a
movie I never need to see again), The Godfather, Part II (a movie I don’t really
want to see right now), and A Woman of Affairs, a 1928 Greta Garbo picture accompanied
by a live orchestra and Kevin Brownlow, so that’s where you’ll find me.
"Thaïs! DuBarry! Garbo!"
Finishing off the evening, and the Festival, are Buck Privates,
with Abbott and Costello (so that’s out), and The Dolly Sisters. Fox musicals
are always crazy and in vivid Technicolor, and a nitrate print of that should
be a treat.
Yep. That's a Fox musical.
After that, it’s the closing night party, the usual round
of good-byes, and a weary walk home in advance of my long drive home on Monday.
